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Writer's Block: Your ePet

Aug. 5th, 2008 | 05:31 pm

What creature would your ideal electronic pet resemble? Would it resemble any? What would it look like?
 A big, thick, veiny cock.

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Writer's Block: Carrying the Cultural Torch

Jul. 26th, 2008 | 07:22 pm

What traditions do you carry on during your day, consciously or otherwise?
 I jack off a lot. 

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Writer's Block: Dream Job

Apr. 14th, 2008 | 02:19 pm

What's keeping you from your dream job?
 I'm a hack.

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HACK!

Apr. 13th, 2008 | 06:19 pm
location: ny fuckin' city
mood: impressedimpressed
music: BUTTROCK!!!!!!!!

hack

I AM THE BESTEST WARM-UP GUY EVER!!!!!  

Everyone knows the best comedians are professional warm-up guys.  Fuck getting my own gigs!  Fuck HBO specials!  I'M A WARM-UP GUY FOR LOW-RATED TALK SHOWS.  My humor is legendary!!!!!!!

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Writer's Block: Home Alone

Apr. 13th, 2008 | 03:31 pm
mood: nostalgicnostalgic
music: Dokken

What happened the first time you were left home alone as a child?
 I got raped.  In the butt.  I liked it. 

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